One day I was having a chat with my brother David. I told him how I admired him for being tough. David is in the army and has been shot at many times.Sometimes he undergoes surgery to remove bullets after which he heads right back on the front line.
During the conversation. David turned right back at me and said, “ Guess what? I admire you Kaka because you have built a business from scratch. That takes lots of toughness than most people realize”
One thing that got reinforced in my mind from our conversation is that you need to be tough to get successful.
Being tough however can be vague so in hindsight toughness in my context means cultivating these five types:
Mental toughness: “Show up and get the job done regardless of how you’re feeling” People won’t treat you right all the time. Sometimes it will rain but it’s about results and not excuses.
Close toughness: “Demand excellence from yourself and those around you consistently” This is hard to do especially for those of us that work with a spouse. I have heard people tell me, “Sudesh I don’t want people to think I am too much” I love people yet I never lower standards even for those close to me. It takes toughness to live such a life.
Responsibility toughness: In the line of work you will get hit. A few weeks ago I confronted a client who was consistently late for meetings and they informed me how I am insensitive. In their view I should have been more understanding. Don’t back away from responsibility because people will hit you. Sometimes you hit no one but get hit for the good of the team. Ask customer care operators.
Block toughness: “Ability to anticipate breakdowns and create solutions before they happen” Creating processes for your work before the team grows. Saving money for a rainy day before the rainy day comes. All that is toughness. Noah built the ark before the flood.
“Arrogant” toughness: In my early years of Consulting I once told a prospect, “I respectfully disagree with your decision” He was dismissing me because I wasn’t a professor and his assumption was I couldn’t train people in sales. I countered and offered him a guarantee that was somewhat arrogant. The message I was putting across was, “My name is Sudesh, I am pretty great at what I do and you need to make the right decision by hiring me” You need toughness to do such stuff.
The next time you think toughness think of the five types I just shared and see which one you excel at and which one you need of build.
